(We open back at Niagra Falls. We hear Lucy backfiring into the parking lot before we see her. Mama, Louie, and Sally are already there. Sach quickly detaches himself from the others as they climb out of Lucy the moment he sees a trash barrel by a store...)
Sally: (As the other four Boys join them) Hi, fellas. How was Canada?
Louie: Did you have a good time on your camping trip?
Slip: Just fine.
Chuck: It was...interestin'.
Butch: We all got lost a lot.
Whitey: And we caught some fish.
Butch: We had a very tasty dinner last night. I didn't know fish tasted so good cooked over an open fire. The Chief worked miracles. :D
Slip: *Shrugs* There ain't been a set-up yet that I couldn't manage som'en edible.
Louie: Where's Sachula? I want to know how he did with fishing.
Butch: He caught three boots and an old tire.
Whitey: He was here a minute ago.
Slip: What's that crazy moron up to now?
(That's when we hear Sach whistling. He rolls the barrel past them.)
Sach: Hi, Chief. Bye, Chief. I'm goin' over the Falls. See you on the bottom.
Slip: *Eyes widen* SACH!
Ranger: (The rather patched-up Ranger who encountered Sach earlier happens to be strolling by; he sees Sach and runs over) Not again! Young man!
Sach: Oop! Go get your own barrel! (He turns the barrel upright and is about to climb in when the Ranger trips over it, lands in the barrel, and goes rolling! He finally rolls off the edge and into the Falls)
Slip: *Belts Sach with his hat* Sach, you lunatic!
Sach: But Chiefy, that guy did it again! He stole my barrel! I want him reported!
Sally: (As the others join them) What's going on?
Slip: There wouldn't be a problem if you wouldn't keep tryin' ta go over the Falls yerself!
Sach: I just want my picture to sell to the paper!
Louie: Sachula, you'll get plenty of pictures of the Falls on that tour boat ride.
Slip: *Grabs Sach's ear* C'mon!
Sach: Oww! Chiefy!
(Cut to a small boat painted red with "Niagra Falls Tours" on the sides in yellow and green.)
*The Boys are hanging around the railing on one side towards the front. Four of them are chatting... Slip is hanging over the railing, looking a little worse for wear.*
Sach: (He's sipping a soda; taps Slip on the back) Hey Chief, want some?
Louie: Maybe we should get you some seasickness pills, Slip.
*Slip groans and waves a hand to shoo Sach away.*
Sally: (She runs over to Slip) Oh, isn't this lovely? I think we're going to go under the Falls soon!
Sach: (He pulls out a camera) Ooh, let me get my camera ready!
*Slip just groans even more.*
Sally: (She rubs Slip's back) Honey, are you ok?
*Slip groans, covering his head with both hands.*
Louie: He's not ok. :
Sally: Maybe we better leave him alone and let him get some air.
Sach: Isn't he already getting air? We're outside!
Chuck: Not quite the same, Sach.
Sally: (Takes Sach's arm) I think you can get a shot of some very nice fish over here.
Sach: But... (Steers him away from Slip)
Louie: (He pats Slip's back) Don't worry, my boy. The trip is just about over. You'll live.
(Louie leaves him, going to look for Mama. As he leaves, another familiar figure, this one far more slender, arrives.)
Woman: (Grins) Hello, Slip.
*Slip visible tenses. He slowly turns his head to look at her and reveal he's VERY pale.*
Woman: I take it you're not a sailor.
Slip: No. *He moans, hanging back over the side.*
Woman: You know, they serve ginger ale on the ship. Maybe you ought to go get some. It might help your stomach.
Slip: *Faintly* Can't move.
Woman: I could bring you some.
Sach: Chiefy! Chief! (He hurries over to them) We're about to go under the Falls! I'm gonna try to get a picture! (Turns to the woman) Oooh, it's you again! My beautiful girl!
Woman: (Laughs) Hello, Sach.
*Slip gives a long moan.*
Woman: (She grins as we hear a roaring) Oooh, I think we're about to go under the Falls!
Sach: (He pulls the camera out) Ok, everyone step back! I want a really good shot! Say "cheese!"
*Unfortunately, the word "cheese" acts as a different trigger for Slip as he heaves over the side of the railing.*
(Sach manages to snap the shot just as Slip heaves and they go under the Falls.)
Sach: Aw Chiefy, you ruined my shot!
Woman: (She rubs Slip's back) Are you all right?
*Slip's moan turns into a whimper.*
Sally: Slip? Are you... (She walks in...just in time to see the woman rubbing his back) What are you doing?
Woman: (Frowns) He's sick. I'm trying to make him feel better.
Sally: I think that's my job.
Sach: Oh come on, you two! Don't fight! I don't want anyone else ruining my shots!
*Slip is too busy moaning to do anything else.*
Sally: Slip, we'll get you something for your stomach. Maybe some graham crackers...
*Slip whimpers and heaves again.*
Sach: (He snaps again and makes a face) Chief, stop wreckin' my pictures!
Chuck: *Walks up by Sach* Did you get your picture?
Sach: Yeah, but Chief ruined it.
Chuck: How did he... *turns to look in Slip's direction in time to see him heave again* Never mind. *shakes his head*
Sach: (Sees that Sally and the woman are fighting noisily, pushing at each other) Maybe we ought to revive the Chief. He might be able to stop them, before they hurt somebody!
Sach: (Shakes Slip's arm) Chief! Chiefy! Sally's fightin' with my woman!
*Slip swats at Sach, trying to get him to leave him alone.*
Chuck: *Taps Sach's arm* They're gettin' worse, Sach!
Sach: (Hands Chuck his camera) Guard this with your life. I'm goin' in.
Chuck: *Looks down at the camera* "With my life?"
Woman: I'm just trying to be nice.
Sally: How nice are we talkin'?
Sach: (He gets between them) Ladies, ladies, please...
Woman: I just wanted to help him feel better.
*Slip is still hung over the railing, moaning lowly.*
Sally: You've been eyein' him since the day the boys arrived.
Sach: Of course she hasn't! She's my girl!
Sally: Your girl, not Slip's.
Sach: Girls, please. Can't we agree to disagree? There's plenty of me to go around!
Woman: Neither. I only flirted with both of them because I could.
Sally: That's all?
Sach: (He tries to take both their arms) Now, why don't we settle this peaceably?
Sally: Slip, is this true? Was she just flirting?
*Slip groans, holding his head again.*
Woman: I just wanted to give the boys a little thrill. *smirks* After seeing you, it looks like he could use it.
Sally: (Narrows her eyes) What?
Sach: Now that wasn't nice.
Woman: You heard me.
Sally: Look, Sister. I've had just about enough of you. There ain't nuthin' wrong with me or Slip.
Sach: Of course not!
Woman: That's your opinion.
Sally: It ain't an opinion. Me n' Slip are tight. Right, Slip?
*Slip whimpers, looking about ready to heave again.*
Woman: Can't you see he's in no shape to even be listening to you right now? Some girlfriend you are.
Sach: Girls, girls! Enough!
Sally: I'll give her enough! (They grapple again...but this time, they push each other too far. Sach tries to grab them...but all three end up going over the rail and into the water!)
Louie: (Wails) Sally! Oh! My poor niece! :O
Chuck: *Groans, then calls out* WOMEN AND MORON OVERBOARD!
*Slip then proceeds to heave again, then slumps to the floor of the boat.*
(Cut back to the top of the Falls. Sally storms ahead, wet and not happy. Sach follows her, also wet and only in a slightly better mood. Louie and Mama follow him.)
*Whitey follows, now the keeper of Sach's camera. Chuck and Butch are last, helping a still-pale Slip. They each have one of his arms over their shoulders.*
Sach: (Wails) Thanks a lot, Sally! I wanted to see the Falls, not fall IN it!
Louie: Sally, what was that all about?
Sally: She's been practically throwing herself at Slip the entire time she's been here!
Mama: Sally, I think you're being silly. It all seemed innocent enough to me.
*Chuck and Butch sit down with Slip on a bench.*
Chuck: It seemed to me like she only wanted to cause trouble.
Louie: (He sits Sally next to Slip) Now come on, you two. You've been through a lot.
Mama: (Nods) You shouldn't let one silly woman come between you.
*Chuck and Butch take the opportunity to get away.*
Sally: (Sighs) She was right about one thing. (Turns to Slip and frowns) I'm sorry about you getting sick.
Slip: *Leans forward, elbows on his knees* You didn't know. I didn't even know.
Sally: I guess I wasn't being a really good friend back there.
Slip: Sal, the only thing I was conscious of back there was the railin' I was clingin’ to.
Sally: Slip...am I too possessive of you?
Slip: *Turns his head to look at her* Yer my girlfriend, ain'tcha?
Sally: Well, yes, but... (sighs) am I boring?
Slip: *Sighs; carefully pushes himself back upright* No, ya ain't boring, Sal. *pauses* I ain't exactly innocent here. Couldn't stop my eyes from wanderin'.
Sach: (He sits down next to them, wringing his hat out) I feel bad, too. I thought she liked me. And here, it turns out she liked Slip all the time.
Sally: You know what? I don't think she cared about any of you. She was just leading you on.
Slip: An' you do care, Sal.
Sally: (She takes Slip's hand) Yeah. I do. I care a lot.
Sach: (He grins) Awww!
Slip: *Gives a little smile* I'd kiss ya, Sal, if I wasn't still feelin' queasy.
Sally: Why don't we go back to the hotel with the other boys and Louie and Mama and get something for your stomach?
Sach: Yeah, it's our last night here! We don't want you feelin' sick on our last night!
Slip: I don't want that, either.
Sach: Let us give you a hand, Chief. (He's about to help Slip when he stumbles over another barrel trash can) Darn trash can jumped right out in front'a me!
Ranger: (It's that same Ranger again - he's battered and bruised and covered in Band-aids) NO! No! Don't go in there!
Sach: No way! I don't want your old Falls anymore! You couldn't pay me to go over the Falls now!
Ranger: (He looks enormously relieved) You don't?
Sach: Nope! Never! Not in a million years! I wouldn't go over the Falls with or without my camera! I wouldn't... (But as he walks along, he trips over the barrel trash can. He ends up in the barrel and, as Sally and Slip watches, rolls over the side. Sally, Slip, and the Ranger watch him go over.)
Sally: I hope he's ok!
Louie: (He and Mama joins them; he gasps) Poor Sachula!
Slip: Too bad he didn't have his camera.
Sally: (Puts her arm around Slip) Maybe we should go get him.
Louie: (Shake his head) Mama n' Whitey n' I will see what's left of Sachula. You two go get Slip’s stomach settled.
Slip: *Slight smile* Thanks, Louie.
Sally: (She grins at Slip) Come on. They probably have those Starlight mints with the red stripes at the hotel. That might help your stomach.
Slip: Those're okay, but yer better.
Sally: (Smiles) Thank you. You're not bad yourself. You and the other guys.
Slip: Yeah, they ain't so bad most-a the time.
Sally: You know, Niagra Falls is a popular spot for honeymooners. (Grins wider) Maybe we'll come back here someday? Just the two of us?
Slip: Do we gotta wait fer the honeymoon?
Sally: (Gives him a small squeeze) Maybe not. (She gives him a kiss as the camera pans to a final shot of the Falls and we fade out.)